Growing your happy
Do you find yourself hopping from one piece of information to another, from one YouTube clip to the next, from one great motivational poster to another (and maybe just one more?) Is your attention scattered and unable to settle?
We can find ourselves bombarded by daily digital squalls and a diet of chronic busy-ness in our lives. I want to ask you to break free for 10 minutes, close your eyes, and reflect…. Create a mini-oasis and instead of skittering along on the surface, dive deep into something really wonderful.
The subject? The lovely stuff in your life.
Quite simply, I want you to think about 3 good things that you experienced in the last 30 days. They can be big or small, fleeting or a daily constant in your life – what they have in common is that they made you feel good. And by diving into these, you’ll uncover important clues to what’s most important to you – your gold – and which provide a powerful guide for future decisions and plans that bring you fulfilment!
Ready? Find 10 minutes when you can be quiet, uninterrupted and just think.
Panning for your gold
First, write down 3 things that made you happy in the last 30 days
Spend a minute re-living each in turn, remembering who was there, where you were, what you were doing and how you were feeling. Really see and feel the moment.
Next, for each experience, pull out the heart of the matter – what insights can you discover about why you felt so good?
And finally, write down the value(s) – the essence of what was activated in each experience.
Here’s how it works in my example:
Last month, my son, his wife and their 2 year old came to visit and we had a beautiful day on the beach, enjoying the sun, relaxing, being inspired and excited by what Ella was doing and exploring. I felt happy and connected, relaxed and at ease with these lovely people that I know so well.
Insights:
· I love being with my family, feeling close, in touch with our history and the new memories we’re making together
· It’s wonderful to see how excited and fascinated toddlers are with everything they discover in the world – they see things with fresh eyes
· I love being outside in the sun
· I love having time to slow down and relax
Values
Write down the key values that are present in the experience, plus other words that your value brings to mind. In my example, I could choose:
Love – connection, closeness, family, being me
Inspiration – learning, openness, enthusiasm, fun
Enjoying the natural world – sun, beach, peace, beauty, outdoors
Relaxation – flow, easiness, freedom
I’m hoping you’re experiencing a nice warm glow as you re-live these experiences and feel what you did as they actually unfolded. And I’m also pretty sure that you’d like more of these in your life.
So let’s plan for that to happen..
In the next month, decide that you will consciously plan an activity, event or experience to honour one of the values you have revealed. Choose the experience that perhaps came up in more than one of your 3 examples or feels most resonant for you right now. Write it down:
I’ll ……
And this will allow me to activate this important value:…………
For example, I might say:
I’m going to walk on the beach next weekend. I’ll give myself time to walk, breathe, drink in the beauty and let my thoughts go where they will
The values I’m honouring here are: freedom and beauty and relaxation
I’m In!
What else might it take for you to keep this promise to yourself? Do you need to write it out and pin it on the fridge, make a poster, say it out loud to a friend, send it out on Instagram or just write it in your diary? How can you protect it from the many calls on your time?
Whatever it takes, be kind to yourself and allow yourself the time and space to enjoy this experience to the full.
So you’ve found your gold – and you know you have the capacity to find it again and create more of it, every single day