The new retirement - designing the rest of your life
What does the word retirement mean to you?
Do you imagine precious days when you’re in total control of how you spend your hours, or a time when your usefulness and credibility is well and truly over?
Perhaps one of these quotes will resonate:
‘I hate the idea of retirement – all those meaningless days terrify me!’
‘I’m frightened of who I’ll become when I retire – my identity is so tied up with my work.’
‘I’m dreading retirement – I’ve loved every minute of my career.’
‘The word retirement leaves me feeling useless – how can I do something structured and worthwhile when I leave my career?’
‘ Retirement makes me feel my contribution is behind me – I hate the idea that I’m in the waiting room for death!’
While that final comment may sound a bit extreme, there’s no doubt that retirement will mark a big shift from one stage of life to another. When your long career comes to a close, how can you create a meaningful life that uses your many strengths, engages your energy and interest, and gives you a sense of purpose?
‘Retirement’ can sound like a dirty word to some with its connotations of empty hours and lack of purposeful activity.
When thinking about retirement, the focus can be on loss rather than gain: loss of professional identity, structure, community, and purpose.
Others of course can’t wait to leave paid employment behind, and have a long list of activities they want to throw themselves into and places they can’t wait to visit. They see the gains very clearly.
But if retirement looks like walking into a void to you, how can this dread be flipped to create meaningful and enjoyable days, weeks and years?
It’s time to redesign
Retirement is not exactly a blank canvas, but it could be the opportunity to design the kind of life you really want now.
Consider how you want to spend your time, the contribution you want to make, what you need to feel happy and fulfilled – these are all good starting points. While you have a wealth of skills and experience to bring to this new start, there may also be a whole panorama of interests and activities you’re ready to explore.
To begin with, that canvas may seem to be completely blank!
It’s worth taking some proper time to cross this threshold with eyes wide open, letting go (with thanks) for the identity associated with your previous work, and looking forward to the possibilities ahead with an open heart and mind.
This intentional step will help you grasp the new opportunities ahead.
If you’d like an example of how this might work, take a look at my self-guided mini-programme Inspired: starting again with confidence
This isn’t a time for sleep-walking but for conscious choice
And if that sounds too much pressure, bear in mind that if you set off in one direction and it’s not what you want after all, you are in the driving seat and can easily pivot with nothing lost.
It’s time to experiment, or as Bill Burnett and Dave Evans say in ‘Designing Your Life’ – a time to ‘try stuff.’ So make it stuff that inspires you and makes you feel alive.
If not now, when?
What might this look like?
‘Too much time spent with no purpose is associated with unhappiness. Stay busy! But not with busy work or trivial pursuits, but with meaningful activities.’ – neuroscientist Daniel Letivin
Let’s take a look at a couple of examples.
Last year, I worked with two clients who had built successful careers in very different fields. One had retired already as her profession offered what most of us would consider ‘early retirement’ but Jenny wasn’t ready to sit back and relax just yet.
She had, however, made a false start on her subsequent career and was unsure where to look next and what she could expect at this stage of her life.
The other was thinking about redesigning his ‘work life’ to reduce full-time hours and start completely fresh projects in this newly available time. Will wanted to explore a range of possible options and test out his ideas.
Both admitted to feeling unclear about how to go about this and wanted help to work out what they really wanted from the next phase of their lives and how they could achieve it.
There is no blueprint that suits everyone, but it is possible to create your very own unique design.
First of all we worked on revealing what each really wanted and needed from this next stage and then generated possibilities that matched their brief. This was the time to be expansive and open-minded, to explore ideas they’d never taken seriously before, and to be brave in giving them space and time for serious consideration.
In both cases the end result was an optimistic vision featuring a portfolio of activities that would fulfill their needs and reward them in ways that mattered to them individually. When they knew why each strand of their work was important to them, and could see how their previous experience and strengths could open these new doors, they were ready to leap into futures that were as far away from pipe and slippers as you could imagine.
Each created a mix of leisure, work, inspiration and community activities, and both felt inspired to get going.
This is what they had to say:
Becky’s programme was invaluable in helping me to take control of the next stage of my life and career. I had been in the same job for 15 years and on the same career path for even longer. I had lots of ideas but no plan. Working with Becky gave me clarity over what I want to do and most importantly why, and the confidence to commit to a clear plan. (Will, London)
‘Becky’s structured programme and the reflective work involved in coaching have helped me to gain clarity about my core values, passions and true purpose.
With a renewed sense of confidence, and clearer vision, a great job opportunity came my way. The role was in line with my purpose and values and perfect for me. We also discussed other options that would complement my new role, so I now have a new lease of life and a blueprint for my next steps.’ (Jenny D. retired police inspector)
How about you?
Economists have coined the term unretirement to describe the hordes of people who retire, find they don’t like it, and go back to work. Between 25 and 40 percent of people who retire reenter the workforce. – Daniel Levitin
So if your ‘retirement’ blank canvas is looking terrifyingly blank, don’t worry, you can change that. A happy retirement isn’t just about financial planning – although that’s the advice we are all urged to consider – but also what you really want and need from this phase of your life.
This is true reevaluation: recalibrating to design the best possible way of living, enjoying and contributing.
For many, this is a field of exploration they’ve never truly considered before, so it’s worth digging deep into what makes you feel vibrant and energized, and the things you are looking forward to building in the years ahead. When you know yourself well, you’ll be able to follow the trail of clues towards a fulfilling retirement. Each of us needs different things.
If you’re starting to think about ‘retirement’ and want to explore how you can make this a rich and meaningful chapter in your life, I’d love to hear from you.
Just drop me a message to arrange a free chat about how to get started.